Letter to LL

My precious baby girl,

How wonderful you have made my life. You have brought so much joy and magic to our family. At this time of year, it makes you realise how lucky and grateful you are to have the most amazing, special people in your life.

You are the most precious thing to me. You are my world, and I love you to the ends of the earth. When I see your face my heart lights up. Your big blue eyes, like a winter wonderland, they make my soul smile. Your cheeky grin, your mischevious laugh, they just melt me. I’m so blessed to have you. You have been the making of me. You have made me the mother I have always dreamed of being, and I’m at my happiest when I’m with you. You won’t know it now, but one day, when you have a child of your own, you will know how it feels to love your baby. There are no words to describe that feeling. It’s like meadows full of flowers and butterflies, the sun shining down making everything warm and green and lush. But a hundred times better than that. Your little hands, wrapped round my fingers, squeezing them whilst you watch Beatrix Potter. Your mesmerised face as you empty my make up bag, holding my eyelash curlers up to your face. Your little fingertips touching my eyelashes, you move them over, squishing them into my eye. You find this fascinating and I can see the curiosity on your face. The way your hair dries after your bath. Like dandelions in the rain. I can’t help but sniff it. Every time I hold you. How you launch yourself across the landing, grasping your little Oopsy Daisy and Iggle Piggle figures in each hand. You pant away with exertion to reach me sitting on the chair in your nursery! How you think repeating “gadda, gadda, gadda” all the time is actually something we all understand. The cute little sounds you make when you’re eating a buttery tea cake.

I humour the challenging times, too. How we battle to dress you every morning and evening. Your daddy isn’t impressed at how much you seem to not like having clothes on. He’s asked you if you could please grow out of this before you’re out there meeting boys! When we change your nappy you decide to flip over onto your tummy, even when there’s a stinking poo in there. Or how about when mummy is getting you undressed for your bath. As soon as your nappy come see off that’s your cue to wee everywhere. Or push a poo out like you did the other morning. Just like that, there it was. An adult size number two. Thanks for that. How you throw your dinner that I’ve lovingly made you onto the floor. How you wake up at 1.30am and decide you will only settle in mummy and daddy’s bed. Then when you’re in it you decide you’d rather be wide awake instead, squealing and babbling whilst we desperately try and get some sleep.

You are one special little girl, and the magic of Christmas just emphasises that even more. But I don’t know how it could, as I see this already every single day.

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I love you so much.

Mummy xXx

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